Teens - Dating Violence

What if I have a Friend in an
Unhealthy Relationship?

If you know someone who is in an unhealthy relationship there are some things you can do. It is important to know that you can't fix your friends problems or "do it for them". Hopefully your friends can see the unhealthy relationship and use the support you are offering to get through it. Here are a couple of things for you to remember.

Believe your friend. It may be hard for your friends to talk about their unhealthy relationship. You may be the first person they are talking to about it, and if they get the sense you don't believe them, they may not tell anyone else.

Help your friend recognize the unhealthy parts of their relationships.  Ask questions and discuss what is going on with your friends. Let them know what you see as a problem and that they do not deserve to be treated this way.

Listen. Be available when your friend wants to talk about the relationship. Be supportive without giving advice or trying to fix the situation.

Don't blame.  It is important not to blame your friend. Help your friend understand they are not at fault, the one doing the abusing is. You may want to remind them that nobody has to stay in an unhealthy relationship.

Planning is important.  Help your friend decide what options they may have if the unhealthy relationship continues. Do they need to get a "Trusted Adult" involved?

Stay Friends.  Sometimes it may be easier to pull away from the relationship with this friend than to help them through this struggle. But remember they felt comfortable enough with you to ask for help. If it is too much for you to handle alone, find other support people to help, such as Hands of Hope.

Respect your friend's privacy.  Keep the incident between you two. Don't tell anyone that doesn't have to know. It is your friend's right to choose who to share this with.

What if I am in an Unhealthy Relationship?
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