Children and Teens Program

• Each person feels whole without the other. You enjoy being together, however you do not need to be together.
• Each person feels responsible for his or her own well-being and happiness. You are not dependent on each other for your happiness.
• Each person feels responsible for his or her own self-esteem. You feel good about yourself no matter what anyone else thinks.
• A balance exists in your relationship between togetherness (we) and separate (I). You both understand the difference between "you", "me", and "we".
• Each person has the ability to establish and appreciate relationships with other people.
• Each person has the ability to communicate effectively. You are open, honest, assertive, and clear with each other as well as willing to listen to each other.
• An opportunity exists in the relationship for the support and growth of each person and for the couple as well.
• Each person brings a commitment to the relationship. You are dedicated to staying in the relationship as well as putting your time, effort, and energy into it.
• Each person is willing to be honest.
• Each person has the ability to accept the other as he or she is.
• Each person is willing to negotiate their differences and fight fairly.
• Each person has established healthy boundaries and are able to express when those boundaries have been crossed.
• Each person is willing to recognize when the relationship is changing.


Dating Bill of Rights

• I have the right to refuse a date without feeling guilty.
• I have the right to ask for a date without being crushed if the answer is no.
• I have the right to choose to go to parties alone without feeling I've got to pair up with someone.
• I have the right to do almost anything as long as it does not hurt someone else.
• I give myself the right to not act "macho".
• I give myself the right to not act seductively.
• If I do not want physical closeness, I have the right to say no.
• I have th right to start a relationship slowly, to say, "I want to know you better before I become involved."
• I have the right to be my own self without changing to suit others.
• I have the right to change a relationship, to say, "We used to be close and I want something else now."
• I have the right to be told a relationship is changing and not to blame myself, or change myself to keep it going.
• I have the right to an equal relationship with the opposite sex.
• I have the right not to dominate or be dominated.
• I have the right to be quiet or spirited without being misunderstood.
• I have the right to act one way with one person and a different way with someone else.
• I have the right to change my goals whenever I want to.

click for a printable Abusive Relationship Inventory